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by Tikhar

Caesar,

This will be a long post, but I would appreciate it if you would read it.

When I discovered your blog a year ago I was a ‘racialist’ Christian. Not even just a neo-Christian: an outright Christian. I would say I was at Level 4 on Mauricio’s scale.

At first, your blog posts filled me with anger, disgust and despair. You had revealed my belief system for the Chimera that it was: irrational, contradictory and two-faced. And I hated your for it. You dashed my belief in God or the afterlife, the belief that co-existence with non-Aryans was possible and more importantly my belief that Christianity and Christian values were compatible with The Fourteen Words. Almost every part of me wanted to leave this place and never come back, but something inside of me said, ‘Stay and push through the pain’.

I dreaded every new blog post and comment you created and put off beginning to read your essays until about two months ago, because I knew the further I went the more my worldview would be dismantled.

I scoured the internet in a frenzy to look for any piece of evidence that would debunk or rebuke you, but found none because no debunkings and rebukes were possible.

Eventually, I arrived at the conclusion that your explanations for the decline of Aryans, and the solutions of how to fix it, made more sense than any other, and I accepted them. And the most astonishing thing of all? I achieved this in the span of but a year! Far quicker than the 5-10 years Apollokult had estimated. You had rehabilitated me and made me sober.

Sober. That is the word I use.

Because my actions were like that of an addict who had been presented with undeniable proof that their addiction is harmful and leads to a dead end. When such a situation happens, an addict will respond frantically, even violently. They will search for any and all excuses for why they should be allowed to continue their destructive behaviours: 95-99 percent of them will fool themselves and go into relapse.

However, there are a scant few that will be honest with themselves and accept that there is no excuse, take the step into sobriety, and help others to do the same.

I am such a case.

Published in: on December 11, 2020 at 4:54 pm  Comments (14)  
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14 Comments

  1. Thank you again Caesar honoring me in such a way, and for all the things you do.

    • 👍

  2. Caesar,

    I would like to say one more thing. I want to offer you more words of encouragement and motivation.

    You are 62 years old, and still in search of a successor. There are people in this world who are far older than you. Yes, partly because of genetics, but also because of lifestyle choices.

    It may very well be that you could die of a heart attack tomorrow, but it could also be the case that you could live to the ripe age of 80 or 90. Maybe even 100! You COULD have 18-38 more years of life. 18-38 more years to choose your successor. 18-38 more years to send out three-eyed crows. Whether or not that happens depends on you.

    The point of what I am saying is that if you take care of yourself, you could still have plenty of time to achieve the things you wish to achieve.

    So please. Please, please, please. Put as much vigor and veracity into your own personal health as you do your intellectual studies. Indeed, I would say that you have a DUTY to do so.

  3. Are there any ideas as to what exactly allows that 1% of Christian racists to question their own beliefs? All this matter of apostasy is so mired in psychology (or genetics?). Tikhar is right, it’s probably akin to talking a drug junkie out of his ruinous habit. But is it all purely a fight over winning out the Aryan bodies? The bodies that have been snatched by the spider of Christianity?

    The Little Mermaid by Hans Christian Andersen might be a reflection of the troubled soul of the Aryan, where his nature has been rendered mute, and he has taken an oath to die for the Jew.

    • antinatalist44,

      I can only speak from personal experience. Part of the reason why I think committed apostasy was because my father was more involved in my development than my mother. My father is a blonde-haired, blue-eyed Aryan of almost 2 meters in height. Although he is a vile race-traitor who worships a semitic god and married a woman with brown hair and brown eyes, he still retained qualities of an Aryan. For example, when he would pray to his Jewish God he would not say, “Woe was me! Please God, lighten my burden!” but rather “Please God, give me broader shoulders to carry this burden!” So I think his inherent nobility “marinated” within me, along with some prime genetics, and allowed me to commit apostasy.

      He also did not dissuade me from reaching conclusions that differed from his. When I told him I was no longer Christian, and gave him a run-down and “sanitized” reason as to why, he accepted it. Indeed, he even relented is some cases. He went from worshipping the ground Kikes walked on to acknowledging that the persecutions and hatred Kike’s received was brought upon themselves. I would say he is currently between a 3 and 4 on Mauricio’s scale, when he initially was a 0 or a 1. And this transition was achieved with relatively phenomenal speed (about 2 years).

      I hope that at the end of his life I can talk him down to acknowledging Christianity as a Jewish psy-op. My mother, on the other hand, is a lost cause.

      • Remember the priest of the 14 words’ first guideline: about serious matters speak only to Aryan males, never to women. (Although there are a couple of smart women who have visited this blog: the exception that confirms the rule.)

        Give your father a Christmas present: Hellstorm, whose image appears at the right, on the sidebar.

        Any noble Aryan who reads it will be unplugged from the Matrix.

  4. Agreed. Take good care of yourself this winter, CT. Expose yourself to sunlight, sleep well. Keep that immune system ready. Eat meat if you have to. Don’t let some flu bring an early death to the best writer of the darkest hour of the West.

  5. I used to be one of these idiots. This blog completely changed me. It is also what introduced me to the Richard Carrier’s work. And I now see white nationalists for the pussies they really are.

    But I’m still on level 9 of Mauricio’s list. I think that at that point we can implement a eugenics program to gradually get rid of undesirable whites, but without going full exterminationist. Just don’t allow undesirable whites to breed.

  6. CT, once your latest book On Exterminationism is out for sale, what’s the chances to get a signed copy from you directly?
    Thank you for all you do and please, keep strong….

    • Once I can request my proof copy (for some reason Lulu did not accept my Master Card yesterday), you could order another copy and send it to me in Mexico City. If in turn you make a donation so that I can pay the shipping cost by DHL or Fedex, I would gladly send it to you signed.

      • CT, just made a donation, if feasible, can you order the hard copy from Lulu yourself, sign it and send it to me directly afterwards?

      • I have sent you an email.

      • C.T,
        I don’t know if you’ve noticed or know yet but at least for me your backup site Westsdarkesthour.com appears to be down it went down right in the middle of my downloading your On Exterminationism.

      • It’s working now.

        I am paying to make that site armoured against attacks.


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